Moon Reflections - Full Moon in Virgo / New Moon in Pisces

These cycles in parenthood are different. The experiences have a different frequency, a deeper correlation, and a more succinct resonance. There’s been a slow process of unpacking - not only my pregnancy, the birth, and her 4th trimester but the 20-odd years before then that made this experience possible. Before my daughter, I would bleed during the full moon and ovulate during the new. Now it is reversed.

During the full moon in Virgo while hot, eager, almost stalking my next up level on a somatic and energetic level - the external processing was in such a detailed and specific path. I felt swollen. With nowhere to go to go held or heard, I turned inward, I turned to service, I turned to care. I started training for a 5k, I spent too much money at REI. I redirected the anger of others’ carelessness into the responsibility of not advocating for my needs. I didn’t justify my way of life, to those I do not respect, to those who haven’t had the privilege or curse to walk my path(s). I felt grounded and in my body and in reality. I did not want to escape the pain, I wanted to learn from it.

As the weeks pass, I ebb and flow. The New Moon in Pisces is now in tow. I am a bit somber for the lines I’ve now drawn, for those who have bowed out and in my head have bowed down. I crave a worthy suitor, a worthy sparring partner. Yet when presented with a debate, it’s not stimulating, it’s rather flat with no intention. I remember the withdrawal of last autumn, the stale and salty tears that were etched on my cheeks. The deep, deep, promise to persevere.

And now I’m here. As I bleed I am overjoyed to release this last cycle. I see the changes in myself. I am very fearful of wasting time. Or maybe of having my time stolen.

My Jupiter is in Pisces, I was born during a retrograde. The healing within myself, the abundance of my life, the power of my God, all things I never had the faith to believe in. I am grateful. I am full. I am content. Does that mean I ignore the atrocities of the world? Do I forget the perils of this nation? Do I ignore the screams of my siblings across this ever-evolving place? No.

Seemingly conjunct concepts can exist in harmony with intention.

With all my love,
Jae